Showing posts with label Bullying. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bullying. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

It's O.K. not to be O.K.

If you read my posts regularly you may know that I have a tiny obsession with vocal talent shows like X Factor and American Idol... Every now and then, I find a reason to admit it and include that obsession in my blog.  THIS particular girl's audition, Jillian Jensen, brought tears to my eyes, and I actually mentioned her audition to one of my beautiful young clients who is currently struggling with bullies in her school...

LIVE STRONG...

Friday, July 27, 2012

Words to live by...

A popular nursery rhyme goes like this... "Sticks and stones may break my 
bones, but words will never hurt me". Even though this rhyme is said to 
inspire strength and resistance in children who are being bullied and 
harassed, but the truth is, words do hurt... Badly!
One book on this topic that I can highly recommend is by James 
Garbarino, Ph.D. and Ellen deLara, Ph.D., titled: "And Words Can 
Hurt Forever" (link).  I have met Mr. Garbarino personally and I 
have a lot of respect and admiration for his research. 


Not only does the book highlight the scaring effects of words (which 
is related to emotional bullying) and the warning signs to look for, but
it also presents parent recommendations and pointers on how to protect
our adolescents from these effects. The book is very well researched but
it is important to note that it is based on the American population, so for
my local readers there are some parts that may not be applicable in
Kuwait or relatable. Bullying, however, is universal, and the dangers
are growing at an alarming rate due to children's exposure and access to 
violence (among other social, economic and environmental factors). 


I have written about bullying several times in this blog, do feel free to review 
the following posts:




I leave you with some words to live by...




Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Mean Girls...

Bullying... A topic we frequently talk about her at PTL.  Here is a great way to talk about this topic with your children.  Share this new song by Rachel Crow with your daughter this summer, and ask her about school and friendships.  As a parent, you could help not only in teaching your daughter about assertiveness and protecting herself, but it is very important to teach her about empathy.
Let us, one by one, teach our children to protect themselves and others, and not be bystanders allowing the bullies to continue tormenting others... Enjoy the song!

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Be The Difference

"It feels like everybody just turned against me. It was like nine of them, nine or ten of them, calling me stupid and dumb, and they started throwing things at me, and one of the guys said something to me, and he threatened me ..."
-JA’MEYA

"If it involves repeated, malicious attempts to humiliate a helpless victim, if the victim is fearful, does not know how to make it stop, then it’s bullying."
- Kim Zarzour

These are just some of the quotes collected by a wonderful multidisciplinary team of directors, producers, parents, professionals and students who are involved with the Bully Project.

The Bully Project highlights solutions that both address immediate needs and lead to systemic change. Starting with the film’s STOP BULLYING. SPEAK UP! call to action, The Bully Project will catalyze audience awareness to action with a series of tools and programs supported by regional and national partners.
The Bully Project is a collaborative effort that brings together partner organizations that share a commitment to ending bullying and ultimately transforming society.
Bully, is the movie that is the cornerstone of this project.  I leave you to watch the trailer, as the movie speaks for itself.



Do visit their website for some wonderful resources such as: toolkits for parents, educators, students and advocates.  They also provide a helpful and easy PDF file with an introduction on bullying that you can share with others (this is where the quotes above came from).


BE THE DIFFERENCE

Saturday, February 4, 2012

From bullied to applauded...

From bully victim to an inspirational performance at American Idol... This performance brought me to tears... I wish we can all find compassion and teach our kids to be more compassionate to those who need it the most... Reach out and show people you care...
For more bullying information check out my previous post: 0% Tolerance.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

0% Tolerance





No, I am not promoting rapping in this post, but I am applauding confidence in speaking about serious matters.  This young boy, not only had the courage to showcase his talent, but chose to rap about a very dangerous and real threat... Bullying.

Bullying happens in most venues where there are large groups of kids.  It can happen in schools, gyms, family gatherings, parties, etc.  There are different types of bullying, which include cyber bullying.  Cyber bullying refers to the use of the Internet, interactive and digital technologies or mobile devices to harm others in a repetitive and intentional way.  It is usually adopted by children in middle school.  

Girls usually use more subtle ways of bullying, including gossiping and exclusion (leaving the girl out of the group).  Boys use more apparent and more aggressive ways to bully, including repeated physical attacks.

Parents and carers for children need to educate themselves and their children about bullying.  it is usually a vicious cycle that exists due to fear and ignorance.  Take a look at this following diagram to view the cycle:



The problem remains and exists when children refuse to speak-up.  In schools, having teachers around is helpful, but kids are manipulative and smart, and they can find places that are not supervised.  It is thus, very important that schools adopt a No Tolerance policy to bullying.  The first step though, is to educate the kids and adults about the dangers and consequences of bullying.

Another key defense to this threat is building your child's self-esteem.  If your child is confident enough to stand-up to the bully, or report an incident s/he has seen, we break the cycle.  As you can see above, there are individuals who witness the bullying and do not interfere, these individuals have allowed the bullying just by remaining quiet.  The diagram below is the same cycle, but AFTER an educational intervention.  You can see how the defenders, supporters, and passive defenders have shifted to the right side of the cycle.  This means they are more likely to seek help and support the victim.




This next image is a nice one to show your kids when you are discussing bullying.  Do ask yourself and them "where do you fit in in this cycle?"



This is a short post for us to think about bullying and address the issues.  I will continue talking about bullying in future posts and cover aspects including what should be done if your child is being bullied and if you suspect that you child is a bully...