Holiday Reflection...

As the New Year approaches and the festivities of the holidays commence, many of us start thinking about the past year…. The difficulties, surprises and pleasures we have had.  Some of us make lists and others resolutions.  It is important to reflect and deflect in any way you find useful.  Dr. Marilyn Price-Mitchell suggested in an article in Psychology Today that parents keep these two resolutions:

1.      Be a positive role-model
2.      Help my kids believe in themselves

What wonderful resolutions! They are not easy, and they are not straight forward, but they are very important.  To help you with these resolutions, I ask you to think about your own experiences this year, as an individual and as a family.  Learn from the mistakes, and celebrate the successes… Think about the important things (including people, events, activities, etc) in your life, and how much time and love you dedicate to these things.  Remind yourself and others around you that you deserve love and deserve to be happy.  Believe in your self and your children will follow...  Feel positive about your life and the positivity will transcend to your family...

Here is a song which is perfect for our little post today…

This holiday season I wish you all Love…

The Other Voice: Morning Observations

A reflective "The Other Voice" post by Dr. Siddiqa Hussein, my wonderful colleague at Soor Center...

As I am driving to school around 6:45am , making my way through that stressful  traffic , listening to my Indian classical music to keep me calm and help me deal with the traffic, this is what I observe...


A mother, wearing headphones, listening to her IPod (defiantly some nice music) pulling a crying or half–asleep 4-year-old child on the road side to the school. Does she know that the child is crying? Is she aware of her son? I wonder that...


Another mother, pinching her 3-4 year old daughter’s right ear so hard that the child is screaming on the road. I wondered what could have gone so wrong early in the morning that the child deserved such harsh punishment...


A child, looking out of the window, sad, lost gazing on the road and his mother is talking on phone...


A child waving or smiling at others and her father is talking on phone... 


Children are fighting at the back and their mother is looking out of the window...


There are a variety of observations; pleasant and unpleasant in the morning. But the question is how do we want to start our day?. I want to ask that first mother, who preferred to listen to IPod rather than her child: how does she feel when she is not heard? How would be the day if it is started with a painful pinch? It is really hard to get up early morning and leave your comfortable & cozy bed  and go to school.


Dear parents please understand that it is very important for everyone, big or small to start a day on a happy note. Give them your full attention for those 10-15 minutes; encourage them to look forward to a good day. Remind them about good behaviors. I often ask my parents to put stars on the two hands of their young children and say to them: “You are mummy’s son/daughter and you are the best. Whenever you look at  the stars remind yourself that you are mum’s best son and you should focus in the class and listen to your teacher.   Whenever you look at the stars, feel that your mum is with you”. Such verbal cues with positive statements make them feel special and loved.  

Please start the day with a Big smile and Big hug.

"The Other Voice"- Is our contributing authors post.  If you would like to contribute, email me at zalzabin@gmail.com for approval, editing and eventual posting:)

A splash of yoga in your coffee?

This morning, I woke up excited that I was finally able to do Yoga again!  Not only do I do it for myself, but it always gives me new ideas to try to use in my therapy sessions.

Yoga with kids can have many benefits.  I am basing this post on personal experience rather than any scientific or educational background.  Children, especially younger ones, tend to learn more concrete facts, and are able to remember and implement behaviors that have been modeled for them.  Aside from the many health benefits to yoga, it can be an effective tool to teach children about discipline, impulse control and mastery of their body.  For the sake of simplification, I will divide three different aspects of yoga and explain some of the benefits for each.  Again, this is very simplified, and you can find many more benefits to yoga.    

• Meditation: a short and relaxed period of looking at an object of your choice (i.e. candle with a child that is not too active or oppositional), to teach kids about focusing and controlling impulses.  It can be used as a gateway into what the child is preoccupied with, and what s/he is thinking.  Meditation also helps increase concentration and attention.

• Deep breathing: Deep breathing can be used to teach kids about psychosomatic symptoms.  For example, "when we are afraid or very angry, our heart beats super fast! But we can calm our heart when we do this trick...": have the child sit down and relax then do 10-20 repetitions of deep breathing.  When the child realizes that through the breathing his/her heart did slow down, they feel empowered and encouraged to try self-calming methods.  Deep breathing is also inherently relaxing, so for your older and anxious/stressed child, it will be very helpful.

• Yoga poses:  The idea behind it is mastering control over your body, which helps all children in general become more aware, and thus more able to express themselves.  It also decreases impulsivity, and teaches discipline.  It can help with adjusting posture, and with older children, can teach them about body language (how to look confident, for example).

Let's get active and reflective